


The Palmer Administration

by graytheglowinggay



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Ableism, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Politics, American Politics, Autistic Carlos, Autistic Cecil, Cecil's Family is Native American, Coming Out, Engagement Rings, Fluff and Angst, Hijabi Dana Cardinal, Homophobia, Implied Sexual Content, Light Angst, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Meltdown, Minor Original Character(s), Native American Cecil, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Political Alliances, Political Drama, Secret Relationship, Shapeshifter Cecil, Stim Toys, Stimming, Typical Night Vale Weirdness, YouTube, YouTuber Janice, self-injurious behavior
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2018-11-18 21:58:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 16,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11299659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/graytheglowinggay/pseuds/graytheglowinggay
Summary: After a long and grueling campaign, Cecil Palmer is now the President of the United States. He has a knack for politics, a staff full of talented people, and a nation that, if not loves him, at least tolerates him. However, President Palmer has a secret, a secret which, when revealed, may cause the whole tower to come crashing down.Updates every other Sunday(next update: 11/12)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> One quick note: every character who has a last name that we weren't told in the show will have their last name represented by "###". This is because I don't really want to figure out fitting last names for these characters.
> 
> Also, some notes about this world:  
> 1) The time period is ours, with a few changes regarding who's in power. This means that the levels of homophobia are comparable to today.  
> 2) Things like dragons and shapeshifters are a normal part of this world, and they face systemic discrimination similar to that against racial minorities.

The hell of campaigning had just ended, and the real work was just about to begin. The now officially sworn in President Cecil Palmer walked through the West Wing, taking stock of his staff moving in. Even though he was inaugurated a week ago, he had a feeling that it would be several weeks until everyone felt comfortable inside the massive mansion, himself included. Even with inviting his sister and her husband and daughter to live with him, the Executive Residence always felt so empty. Besides, the one that he wished was there above all others couldn’t move in yet. There was much more to do before that point. Well, he still had four more years to figure out how to call the centuries-old halls “home”.

“Maureen, what’s on my schedule for today?” Cecil asked his personal aide, one Maureen ###.

“There is a Cabinet briefing scheduled for 2:00 pm, and then a meeting with Pamela Winchell directly afterward, sir.” she replied after a quick glance down at her clipboard.

“Can you schedule a 7:00 meeting with the Scientific Advisory Board?”

“What will be the subject of this meeting?”

“Agricultural advancements and biotechnology.”

“I’ll be right on it, sir.” Maureen tucked her clipboard under one arm and dashed out of the room.

Cecil hated having to use such roundabout terminology, but it was what they had to make do with. It did the job.

“Cecil, Cecil!” a voice yelled from across the room.

Cecil didn’t need to turn around to know who it was. Very few people that he worked with called him by his first name. “Hello, Janice.”

“So, I was thinking that tonight we could do our very first Q&A video from inside the White House! I’ve gotten a lot of really interesting questions, and I think everyone will love your answers.” Janice explained.

Because of Cecil’s lack of a spouse, his niece Janice had taken on the duties of the First Lady, and Cecil certainly thought that she did a hell of a job. 26 years old and fresh out of law school, she was charismatic, smart, and had become somewhat of a celebrity among teens and young adults. She ran a very popular blog where she answered questions about her uncle’s campaign and his political plans, and also hosted many vlogs and livestreams that her uncle or various members of his staff would occasionally participate in. Cecil often said that Janice was the reason that young people voted for him.

“I’m afraid that things won’t work out for that tonight. I’ve got… prior plans.” Cecil replied.

“For what?” Janice asked.

“A 7:00 meeting with the Scientific Advisory Board.”

“Oh,” Janice said, quiet for a rare moment. “Ohh. I get it. Enjoy your meeting, Uncle Cecil.” She exaggeratedly winked at him and wheeled away.

Cecil shook his head and continued to walk, this time to the Cabinet Room for the very first full Cabinet briefing of his administration.

* * *

“Preparations for the G-20 dinner in two month’s time are all going according to plan.” The Faceless Old Woman, President Palmer’s Secretary of State said.

Unsure of what to focus the meeting on, Cecil had decided to just have each of his Cabinet members report on their department’s current activities. However, if he was being completely honest, they weren’t very engaging proceedings. Each department was in some state of transition; reworking plans and projects that the previous administration had put in motion, and deciding which things needed to get done first. Frankly, there wasn’t much that Cecil needed to do yet, but you had to hold a first cabinet meeting sometime, and now seemed as good of a time as any.

Even after the interminable cabinet meeting was done, there was still his meeting with the White House Press Secretary, Pamela Winchell. It wasn’t exactly that he didn’t want to meet with her— she was quick-witted and well-spoken under pressure, the essential qualities of the post— but she had a bad habit of going off on tangents, and before he knew it, a conversation about the subject of tomorrow’s White House public address had turned into a rant about Pamela’s hatred for white chocolate. Meetings with her tended to drag out, to say the least. Still, meeting with her for coffee and going over responses to press questions meant that Cecil’s work appointments were almost over. Almost over, of course, because he still had the meeting with the Scientific Advisory Board, which was totally just another thing that he had to do for work that was definitely not the only thing that got Cecil through the cabinet meeting and was in no way the thing that meant that Cecil was only half paying attention to Pamela’s long ode to dogs. It was just another work appointment. Of course.

That involved champagne and sitting together in the Rose Garden.

That involved homemade tamales and complaining about work.

That involved sitting on a cold bench underneath a blanket and just enjoying proximity to another human being.

That involved slow, heated kisses that sharply contrasted the cool, late winter air.

That would have gone further if it weren’t for keeping up appearances.

That had gone further in the past when they didn’t need to care about appearances.

It was only the president’s best-kept secret, of course.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this! Unlike every other fic that I've ever written, this one will actually be updated on a regular, consistent schedule. If anyone is confused by whose job is whose, I'll add a key for that in the end notes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil decides that it's time to come out, but before he can he needs to consult his staff.

They say that the press is a politician’s worst enemy. This sentiment had certainly rung true for Cecil Palmer.

Cecil had lived almost two decades as a closeted politician. The public eye caused him to lead a dual existence. With his friends and family, he was out and proud, not ashamed in any way of who he was. In public, he could never be that. Even with his friends, he had to be careful. One could never know which new friend would leak something to the tabloids.

Two years ago, Cecil had met Carlos, and things had twisted some more. Now, not only was he a closeted politician, he was a closeted politician with a secret boyfriend. And then a closeted politician with a secret boyfriend who decided that he wanted to run for president. And then a closeted politician with a secret boyfriend who had now become president. Even now, he was in the same situation that he always had been. Because the leader of the free world was afraid. 

He feared for his own safety and reputation, of course, but more so he feared for Carlos. If Cecil had been single, he would have probably come out already, hell, he probably would have came out when he was still running. But not being single, having a boyfriend, that changed everything. Suddenly, if he came out, it wouldn’t just affect him, it would affect Carlos as well. What if Carlos didn’t want to come out? Would something like that cause them to break up? Carlos was the most important thing in Cecil’s life, and he didn’t want to lose him for the world. The two of them decided to wait on coming out until after Election Day, but that eventually turned into after Inauguration Day, and now… Cecil wasn’t sure what to do. Only a handful of the members of his staff knew about his orientation: his family, Maureen, Vice President Dana Cardinal. Before they could even come out to the world, he would have to come out to the rest of them. 

Cecil was tired of having to talk about scheduling meetings with the “Scientific Advisory Board”, tired of having to awkwardly skirt around his employees’ playful jabs about Cecil’s perceived relationship status, tired of being  _ alone _ in a house that should belong to both of them, tired of being the “Bachelor President”. He wanted to leap out of the White House wardrobe, but first, he needed to assemble a committee. A very special task force, one the likes of the White House had never seen.

* * *

 

“Ok, ‘Operation: Rainbow’ is a go,” Janice said, taking frantic notes while wearing a completely unnecessary pair of sunglasses.

“Could you have picked a less conspicuous name?” Carlos asked. “Also, can you even see out of those things?”

Janice turned toward Carlos and slowly lowered her sunglasses. “No.”

“What’s the plan, Mr. President?” Dana Cardinal asked. She sounded confident, but Cecil could tell that she was nervous. She always fiddled with her hijab when she was nervous.

Cecil opened his mouth to speak, but Janice held out her hand and jumped right into her plan. “The first phase is what I like to call ‘Under the Gaydar’,” Carlos buried his face in his hands. “Before any information can get out to the public, Cecil needs to come out to everyone in the White House. Now, there are two ways we can do this: either Cecil can come out to them individually, or we can organize some grand memo to be sent out.”

“What exactly would the memo say? ‘Hello, your boss, the President of the United States, is a flaming homo’?” Maureen asked.

“Though I like the idea, I’m thinking that we need to go with something a little more subtle. Something mentioning an anniversary, perhaps? I heard that it’s coming up soon.” Janice replied. At the last sentence, she turned toward her uncle and raised one eyebrow.

“Janice, you know that our anniversary isn’t until next week, right?” Cecil replied.

“But they don’t know that,” Janice said, smirking.   


“Why don’t I just go around the White House with Cecil? If anyone asks, we’ll tell them the truth. It’ll travel around quickly enough.” Carlos added.

“If we do that, how can we be sure that the information doesn’t spread outside the White House? None of these ideas seem like they’ll be able to get around to everyone without being a security risk.” Cecil said. Despite his best efforts to cover up his worry, it still was obvious in his voice. Hearing this, Carlos moved his chair closer to his boyfriend, took one of Cecil’s hands into his own, and started gently rubbing his thumb over the back of his hand.

“If you think it’s that big of a security risk, we can just skip Phase One and move right into Phase Two, what I have named ‘Free the Gay’.”

“And what does that entail?” Dana asked.

“Let it leak to the press that the President is planning some big announcement. Make it clear that everyone who’s anyone is going to be listening. Try to get as many news outlets as possible there. Pamela will stand near the podium; people are expecting it to just be a regular White House announcement. Then, suddenly, the President emerges from behind a curtain. He walks up to the microphone and speaks. The crowd goes silent. Dozens of news stations are listening to what he has to say. ‘I’m gay’ he says, in fancier words than that. ‘I have a boyfriend’ he says. 300 million people are listening to their leader’s words. It’s all that the press talks about for weeks. People will be surprised and angry, of course, but you two can sleep together in your White House bed knowing that you came out to more people at once than anyone in the history of ever.”

“The most people I’ve ever come out to at once were the kids in my high school chemistry class,” Carlos looked off into the distance as if he could see the day clearly in his mind’s eye. “Never again.”

“Carlos, sweetie, you don’t have to worry about saying a thing. I’m the one who has to get up there and say it,” Cecil replied. He gave his boyfriend’s hand a comforting squeeze. “Besides, I’ll only do this if you’re comfortable with it.”

Carlos took a deep breath. “When is the soonest you can schedule this ‘Presidential Announcement’?”

“Next week, probably,” Maureen replied.

“Happy anniversary, babe,” Cecil said jokingly. “As a gift, I just came out to most of the population of the United States for us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this second chapter. As I promised in the summary of the fic, I will be updating this every Sunday, as my productivity allows. Right now, I've written through Chapter 5, and I'm posting them on this schedule. Hopefully, I will be able to write enough that I can always be written ahead of what I'm posting.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil Palmer is the first openly gay president of the United States.

Saying that Cecil was nervous would be an understatement. He was petrified. Every single time that he thought he was calm again, another bit of anxiety would flare up again, and he would have to start over. More than anything, he wanted to talk to Carlos, but his boyfriend was busy moving his belongings into the White House, just in case the situation turned ugly after Cecil’s announcement. Cecil was certainly grateful for the preparedness. Cecil wasn’t going to let anyone harm a perfect hair on Carlos’s head.

Cecil stood behind the curtain, pacing back and forth. Thankfully, the sound of his footsteps was covered up by the chattering of the assembled press.  _ Cecil, relax. You know the drill. You’ve practiced this a hundred times _ . The speech had taken him hours to draft, not because the words didn’t come to him, but because it never felt right. Only after being reassured by Dana for the seventh time did Cecil set the speech aside and go to sleep.

Cecil heard the sound of Pamela stepping up to the microphone, and heard the crowd go silent. “Assembled members of the press, citizens of America, your President, Cecil G. Palmer.”

Cecil took one last deep breath and stepped through the curtain.

He was greeted by flashing lights and silence. No applause, no cheer, just the silence of hundreds of surprised reporters (which is a rare sound to hear). He set his speech down on the podium. He adjusted the microphone, which wasn’t really necessary, but the delay gave him more time to contain himself. He then spoke.

“Hello, citizens of America. I have not been completely open with you all about certain aspects of my personal life. This was not a decision made out of malice, or to purposefully deceive, but because I— we— didn't feel it was the right time yet. Now, I suppose, it is. I, the president of the United States, am dating someone, and have been doing so for two years. He is a scientist named Carlos ###. Yes, I did say ‘he’. I suppose that this also makes me the first openly gay president. I was dating Carlos while I was running for office, but we both decided that we didn't want my sexuality or relationship status to determine whether or not people voted for me. I want people to vote for my policies, not for me as a person. So, yes, I am gay. I will continue to serve you as I always have, and who I love will not change that. Thank you for your attention. Please direct your additional questions towards Pamela Winchell.” Cecil stepped away from the microphone, and walked back through the curtain, accompanied by a shout of voices that sounded like thunder.

* * *

 

It was on every news channel. “President Cecil Palmer comes out as gay, has secret long-term boyfriend”. “President Palmer stayed closeted because he ‘want[ed] people to vote for [his] policies’”. “What does a gay president mean for the future of America?”.

“Cecil, you should turn off the television. I know that it’s making you upset.” Carlos said. He was unpacking boxes of his clothing and putting the clothes away in a dresser.

“Some right-wing pundits are already using this as a reason why I shouldn’t be trusted on energy policy.  _ Energy policy _ . Because any guy who fucks other guys obviously doesn’t know squat about renewable energy. Wouldn’t having a boyfriend who’s a scientist means that I would know more about those kinds of things, not less?” Cecil turned off the television but began pacing around the bedroom. “I bet you that by the end of the week there’s gonna be tabloid articles trying to figure out which of us is the top and which of us is the bottom,” He sat down on the edge of the bed. “This was a mistake.”

Carlos put down the shirt in his hands and sat down next to Cecil on the bed. He put an arm around his boyfriend’s shoulder and pulled him in close. “Ceec, honey, I know that everything is happening so quickly right now, but I know that the future holds good things for both of us. Even just thinking about you no longer having to hide who you makes me so happy. You can do so much more when you’re not afraid, Cecil. For every person that is upset or angry that you came out, there are much more that are happy, or proud, or maybe even just indifferent. Whatever happens in the world of politics, I’ll still be here for you.”

“Thank you, Carlos. Let’s just go to bed.” Cecil replied.

The two of them changed, Cecil into a pair of pajamas whose main purpose was clearly to make him still look somewhat dignified if duty called in the middle of the night, and Carlos into a pair of boxers and a t-shirt that spelled out “GaY” with the Periodic Table symbols for Gallium and Yttrium. Cecil bought it for their one month anniversary, which might as well have been a thousand years ago. Everything had changed so quickly, not just for Cecil, but for both of them.

“Why didn’t you tell me how comfortable this bed is?” Carlos exclaimed after had laid down.

“I didn’t want to make you jealous,” Cecil replied, smirking. He sat down on the side of the bed.

“Come here, you,” Carlos said, pulling Cecil down from his sitting position and planting a kiss on his lips.

“Carlos, whatever happens, at least I have you here with me now.” Cecil returned the kiss and nuzzled his head into Carlos’s hair. In response, he pulled Cecil in closer. The weight of his boyfriend’s long curls and the sound of his gentle breathing was like a magic spell, and Cecil soon fell asleep, knowing that there was a constant in life, and its name was Carlos.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of coming out.

When Cecil woke up, all was quiet. Carlos was still asleep, arms wrapped tightly around Cecil’s torso, and as he didn’t want to wake his boyfriend, he stayed, letting himself relax into the warmth of Carlos’s embrace. Then he realized, why was Carlos at the White House, in his bed? The events of the previous day all came rushing back to him. He had come out to an entire nation. Hell, he had come out to the entire world, more or less. _Shit_. There were probably dozens of foreign leaders that wanted to talk to him. Some would be supportive, but others… there were now several countries that if Cecil went to them, he could be charged with a capital crime, and there would be nothing he could do because being guilty of that crime was part of who he was as a person. Well, as much as he may have wanted to, he couldn’t cuddle with his boyfriend and avoid his responsibilities forever.

Carlos, of course, had immediately gone back to sleep after Cecil had gotten out of bed, which Cecil found both adorable and annoying, as he could never go back to sleep after someone woke him up. He took a shower, got dressed (Cecil was very annoyed by the restrictive nature of the President’s dress code, so he made up for it by wearing oddly patterned ties), and left to go get a cup of coffee from the kitchen. The TV was already tuned to a news channel, and it appeared that the newscasters still hadn’t stopped talking about the previous night’s news. The main topic of discussion seemed to be the identity of Carlos, which the reporters had yet to uncover much information about. Cecil made a mental note to talk to both Pamela and Janice about that. Speaking of Pamela… Cecil had yet to talk to any of his staff since he had come out. He supposed that another Cabinet meeting was in order.

* * *

 

“So, I’m assuming that the announcement last night came as a surprise to most of you.” Cecil started.

“Surprising, certainly, but definitely not unexpected.” Secretary of Commerce Jackie Fierro replied.

“I’m happy that you finally came out,” Secretary of the Treasury Diane Crayton said. “Earl and I had a bet going on when you’d finally say something,”

Diane and Earl (who was Cecil’s Secretary of Health and Human Services) had both been friends of Cecil’s since college and were already aware of his sexuality. He and Earl, in fact, had a bit of a complicated relationship back then, but those days were behind them, and Earl was still one of his closest friends despite a strained past.

“Josh and I were watching the broadcast when you gave your speech. Josh was so happy that he couldn’t speak, he just started floating and growing purple scales.” Diane continued.

Diane was a single mother to her son, who was about the same age as Janice. He was bi, and also a shapeshifter like Cecil, and he had faced plenty of heat from his peers for both of those traits. The two of them talked often, mostly about difficult things that they were going through, but sometimes Josh would come to Cecil for help on his homework or advice on what to do in a new relationship, and Cecil would do the best he could. In many ways, Josh treated Cecil like he was the father he never had.

“Well, I’m happy if you and your science fella are happy. If he has any information on new farming technologies, let me know, I’ve got a team that’s hard at work on that subject.” John Peters, you know, the Secretary of Agriculture added.

“I certainly will, John. Are there any other questions? If not, this Cabinet meeting is adjourned.”

* * *

 

“How many people want to talk to me right now, Maureen?” Cecil asked, walking down one of the White House’s halls toward the Oval Office.

“41, sir,” Maureen replied.

“How many of those calls can I ignore without starting a world war?”

“31 of those, sir.”

“Get me the names of those ten people. I’m going to call them from the Oval Office and I don’t want to be interrupted unless there’s some sort of national emergency,” Cecil said.

“Understood, sir. Here’s the list.” She tore off a piece of paper from the notepad on her clipboard and handed it to Cecil. It was a list of the names of various world leaders and important political figures, with their phone numbers listed next to them. Well, Maureen was certainly nothing if not efficient. Cecil quickly nodded in acknowledgment and entered the Oval Office.

* * *

 

“Mr. Palmer, why did you not call me personally before you made the public announcement?” an important senator whose name Cecil had quickly forgotten frantically asked.

“Senator, I told you once and I’ll tell you again, I didn’t want to have to go through the hassle of personally coming out to every bigwig on Capitol Hill. I did what was best for me and my boyfriend. It’s as simple as that.” Cecil replied.

“Well, what’s best for yourself may not have been best for your career. There’s a lot of people in Congress who are angry with you, Mr. Palmer, and it’s not because they disagree with your lifestyle, sir. Well, there are people who are angry with you because of that, but that’s not the point here. They feel betrayed that you didn’t tell them before you told the whole world.”

“I’m sorry if this is unheard of, but I don’t exactly feel comfortable with using the knowledge of my otherwise closeted sexuality as a political bargaining chip. I will not even entertain the idea of telling random congressmen about a very intimate aspect of my identity and my personal life just to show them that we’re all buddy-buddy. Do I make myself clear?”

“I am sorry to have caused you offense, sir, but—”

“No buts. I am disappointed that your first response to this step that I’ve taken is to worry about how this affects you. If you were in my situation, I hope that you would be able to notice how despicable your proposed idea really is. Goodbye, Senator.”

Cecil ended the call and sighed. He leaned back in his chair and ran his hands through his hair. One more call left. Cecil had saved the proverbial best for last, a call to Elinor Mathias, the Prime Minister of the UK. While Cecil wasn’t sure if he should consider the two of them “friends”, the two of them got along fairly well, at least, by world leader standards.

“Hello, Mr. President.” Mathias was always quick to pick up the phone.

“Hello, Prime Minister. I hope you aren’t calling to ask me why I didn’t tell you before all this. I’ve been getting enough of those calls today.”

“Of course not, Mr. Palmer. I had a feeling that you had heard enough of that from the very first call. What I’m calling about is what you’re going to do about the G-20 dinner.”

“What do you mean by what I’m going to do about it?”

“I mean with your boyfriend, Carlos.”

“I’ll bring him to the dinner as my plus one, just like every single other world leader who has a romantic partner.”

“Have you thought about what those other world leaders will think of you bringing your  _boyfriend_ to this event? Your same-sex partner who you aren’t married to, or even engaged to?”

“What’s the problem with that?”

“You bringing him to the dinner will be like a slap in the face to everyone, even those who don’t care that you’re dating a man.”

“Well, what do you think I should do about that?”

“I’d suggest you put a ring on that man’s finger fast before the rumors start flying.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I am posting this chapter from my creative writing course (which is why I'm posting it so late). I believe that I have enough of this written that I will be able to post on Sundays without having to take a hiatus, but we'll just have to see when the time comes. This means that I will most likely not be posting any other fanfiction for the next three weeks, as I will be devoting my writing time to original works. However, I may write things as a bit of a break from the rigors of original works. Either way, thank you for reading.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Talks of a marriage proposal.

“Carlos, what do you think about marriage?” Cecil asked as the two of them sat in the White House Family Theater, dining on leftover takeout and watching _Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home_ together for what was at least the third time.

“It’s a thing that exists…?” Carlos replied. “Why are you asking about that now?”

Cecil let out a long sigh. “A little birdie told me that a whole bunch of people in the international community doesn't take very kindly to the idea of a world leader having a relationship that they don’t see as being ‘committed’.”

“Are you asking what I would think of us being married?” Carlos asked.

“I suppose so.”

“Well, I’m certainly not opposed to it in any way. We’ve been together long enough. It’s just, there’s so much stuff that has to be done with regards to a wedding. Hell, even with a proposal there’s a whole lot of work to be done. I’m not exactly thrilled at the prospect of that much public scrutiny.”

“Welcome to the life of the President’s spouse. Well, future spouse.”

“Is this supposed to be some sort of incredibly convoluted proposal?”

“I certainly wasn’t intending on it, but if that’s what you want…”

“Think of it as a betrothal. We can plan for some sort of grand proposal down the road.”

The two of them sat together without talking for a moment.

“Ceec?” Carlos asked.

“Yes, Carlos?” Cecil replied.

“Has anything bad happened, politically, because of all this?” As he said “this”, he vaguely gestured at the two of them.

“Well, I’m now committing a crime in 72 countries.” Cecil bluntly stated.

“Charming. Any world leaders hate you now?” Carlos asked.

“The president of Russia isn’t exactly thrilled with me now, and neither is the king of Saudi Arabia, but we weren’t exactly buddy-buddy to begin with.”

“Any conservative lawmakers have a heart attack yet?”

“None that I know of, but it’s still early. Personally, I’m waiting for the ‘President Palmer is destroying traditional family values’ ads.”

“We are promoting our sinful lifestyle to the masses.” Carlos deadpanned.

“Damn dirty gays and their healthy, loving relationships. They’re destroying the sanctity of marriage.” Cecil sarcastically replied.

“How long until they’re burning effigies of you?”

“I give it two weeks.”

“Well, even if they do, they’ll certainly have difficulty capturing all of, you know, _this_.” Carlos, of course, was referring to Cecil’s inconsistent appearance. After all, even as they spoke, Cecil’s hair had grown by at least a foot, changed color from brown to bubble gum pink, and turned into ringlets.

“Is this the homosexual agenda?” Cecil asked.

“Perhaps.”

“Well, right now my homosexual agenda is trying to figure out how the hell I can buy rings without people catching onto something.”

“You’ve got smart people working for you, Ceec. I’m sure they’ll find a way.”

* * *

 

“You want to propose? But you just came out!” Pamela Winchell exclaimed.

“What’s wrong with that?” Cecil replied.

“Do you realize how many questions about your relationship I’ve been getting?”

“A lot…?”

“Hundreds, Palmer. Most of them are completely irrelevant, but I still have to answer them because that’s what a press secretary has to do. If I get one more question about how you two met…”

“Pamela, I’ve got it.”

“What?”

“The people want to know about us, why don’t we tell them? Pamela, do you think you could get us a spot on a late-night talk show?”

“I don’t know what the hell you’re planning, Palmer, but—”

“Think about it. We go on a popular TV show. We talk about how we met, the little things that we love and hate about each other, what it’s like to live in the White House, that kind of stuff. All throughout the segment, though, the two of us are acting really fidgety. We keep both looking in our pockets when we think that the other isn’t looking. Suddenly, at the end of the segment, one of us (probably me) gets down on one knee. He launches into a speech about how much the other means to him, and says the monumental words: ‘will you marry me?’. Instead of saying yes or no, the other reaches into his pocket and pulls out the ring he had. It’s a simultaneous proposal! The crowd goes wild! The host makes some witty remark about great minds thinking alike, and asks about the wedding. We casually deflect the question, and walk off stage, hand in hand, to the sound of upbeat music and uproarious applause.”

“So… that’s your brilliant idea?” Pamela deadpanned.

“To be fair, it sounded a lot better in my head,” Cecil replied.

“Well, it’s the best idea we’ve gotten so far. You know what, give me a few more days to think about this, and if I can’t come up with anything better, I might just consider your plan. Regardless of that, you still gotta help me with answering those relationship questions. Why do they think that I know where you two first met?”

“A university library,” Pamela looked at him, confused. “That’s where we met. Carlos noticed that I was admiring him from afar, he gave me a slip of paper that had his phone number and the name of a coffee shop written on it.”

Pamela shook her head. “There is no way that I’m gonna remember all this. That talk show idea is beginning to sound a lot more appealing.”

“So we should do the double proposal on TV?”

“Definitely not. There are so many different ways that it could go wrong.

“Well, you better think of a better idea fast, because there’s only so much longer that I’m gonna wait before I just pop the question, with or without your help.”

* * *

 

As soon as Cecil got out of his meeting with Pamela, Vice President Cardinal ran up to him, out of breath and looking desperate. Part of her hijab had fallen off her shoulder, and her normally rolled-up sleeves had fallen back down. She stopped in front of him, fixed her hijab, and stood at attention.

“Mr. President, these senators are impossible!” Dana exclaimed.

Cecil sighed. “What happened now?” he asked.

“Some of the senators are proposing that any executive action that you make concerning LGBT issues should be disregarded because you have a ‘biased’ stance on the issue.” she replied.

Of course. All of his political actions were no cause for alarm, but god forbid the president not be heterosexual! He could make decisions about whether people that he would never meet would live or die, but he obviously couldn’t be trusted to make the best decision on issues that affected the validity of his very existence.

“And what did you say to them?” he asked.

“I said that President Palmer has shown his propensity towards good judgment in his past decisions, and he was the same person then as he is now.”

“Thanks, Dana.”

“Unfortunately, I’m not going to be able to handle these senators forever. You’re going to have to say something to them in person eventually.”

Cecil sighed. Of course. “Let’s just hope that we don’t have to do that for a while longer.” he said, but even as he said it he knew that any hope for his “sexuality controversy” to blow over quietly was just wishful thinking.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The politics of being an openly-gay world leader. Also, discussions of the acquisition of rings.

Cecil knew that it was going to be an unusual day when The Faceless Old Woman sought him out outside of a Cabinet meeting. The Secretary of State usually didn’t speak to him much when it wasn’t needed, splitting her time between working in her office and plotting with The Woman From Italy, her wife and Cecil’s Director of National Intelligence.

“What is it, Faceless Old Woman?” Cecil asked.

“Since your recent coming out, we have had to reconsider many things that concern the G-20, particularly surrounding which countries support you, which countries are against you, and which have a neutral stance on the issue.” she replied.

“And what have you figured out on that front?”

“Most countries in the G-20 are in support of you and your sexuality. From our best guesses based on press releases and past activities, there are five countries that have an ambiguous stance, and about the same amount would be against you. The largest problem that we’ve run into is balancing between the offense that leaders would have about not being seated near the president and the offense that they would about being subjected to constant reminders of a relationship that they see as being immoral.”

“Well, then it’s a good thing that we aren’t very close to those opposing countries, right?”

“I’m afraid that it isn’t that clear-cut. If I recall correctly, the previous administration was trying to strengthen ties with Russia, and maintaining civil relationships with China and Saudi Arabia is critical in these times. You’re going to have to talk to those leaders, even if it does not seem to be in your best interests as a gay man. There will be negative comments, but I would advise you to take them in stride as is your duty as a world leader.”

Cecil sighed. “I can take it, but I don’t want any of them to be rude towards Carlos.”

“I’m afraid I cannot guarantee that. You cannot control what people say, Cecil. Besides, Carlos seems like a strong man. I’m sure that he will be able to take those kinds of comments in stride.”

Cecil nodded in agreement, but he wasn’t quite on board with what The Faceless Old Woman had said. Yes, Carlos was strong and confident, but there was a difference between regular strength and confidence and the kind that one needed to be able to take comments and insults from other politicians. As smart as Carlos was, he wasn’t a politician, and Cecil was worried that might end up being a problem later down the line.  


* * *

 

“Maureen, do you have any suggestions for how I can discreetly buy engagement rings?” Cecil asked his personal assistant.

“I don’t know, buy them online? Buy them in disguise? Make up some no-homo reason for why you’d be buying them?” she replied.

Clearly, she had no idea what to do.

“Really helpful suggestions, Maureen.” Cecil sarcastically replied.

“Well, I’m sorry that I’ve never gotten married before. Why don’t you ask the people that, I don’t know, have actually gotten married?”

“None of them was the President when they were ring shopping!” Cecil put his head in his hands. “I just want to be able to propose to my boyfriend without the entire world knowing that it’s going to happen.”

“Good luck with that, sir,” Maureen replied.

* * *

 

Cecil did not enjoy talking to his brother-in-law, Steve Carlsberg. There were many reasons for this, all of them personal. Politically, they got along just fine. Steve was a smart man, and when Cecil was inaugurated, he didn’t hesitate to name him Secretary of Education. There was just something about him, though, that just got on Cecil’s nerves. He couldn’t tell if it was his voice or his awkward jokes, or just how overwhelmingly  _ nice _ he was: Steve always managed to rub Cecil the wrong way.

However, Cecil needed to ask him for advice.

“Hey, Steve, can I ask you a question?” Cecil asked after pulling him aside in the hallway.

“Oh, well, sure thing, Cecil,” Steve replied.

“Steve, do you know a good place to buy engagement rings? It needs to be somewhere… discreet.”

“Oh, well, there’s this great place just a couple of miles outside of DC. Really nice shop, high-quality work. It’s where Abby and I got our rings. Oh, don’t worry, they keep things totally confidential. They have a lot of politicians and celebrities as clientele.” Steve replied. He paused. “Wait, are you proposing to—” he asked.

Cecil quickly shushed him and tried to cover Steve’s mouth as he said the last sentence. “Yes I am, just be quiet!  _ No one _ can know about this until it happens! I don’t want word about this to leak out before it’s time, Steve.”

“Oh, sorry about that, Cecil. I’m just so happy for you!” Steve softly exclaimed.

“I’m glad that you’re happy, Steve, but right now I just need you to make sure that no one hears about this.”

“Understood. My lips are sealed.” Steve mimed zipping his lips, locking them shut, and throwing away the key.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a short chapter to hold you guys over-- it's actually the first half of what was going to be the 6th chapter. It got too long, though, so I had to split it up.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Making a video with Janice.

“Hey! Uncle Cecil! Do you have a minute?” Janice yelled at Cecil from across the hall.

“Sure,” Cecil replied. He would always be able to spare time for his niece.

“I was wondering if you’d like to make a video or something answering questions that people have had for you post coming out.”

“Sounds interesting. I’m in.”

“Great! I already have the questions selected and ready. We just need to get to my studio so we can film.”

Janice quickly wheeled off, leaving Cecil to follow her. The “studio” in question was just a spare room in the White House where Janice had set up her video-making equipment. Cecil supposed that it met all the criteria for a studio, but there was nothing professional about it.

Once they arrived, Janice started getting everything ready for filming, including moving a chair in front of the camera for Cecil, since, for obvious reasons, she normally didn’t need one.

“This isn’t going to be a live video, so feel free to make as many mistakes as you need to,” Janice explained as she adjusted the camera. “I’m gonna be setting this up sort of like an interview, I’ll ask you the questions, and you just answer them on the spot as honestly as possible.”

“Sounds good,” Cecil said. In any other circumstance, there was no way that he would sound calm before an interview.

Janice wheeled her chair in front of the camera, to Cecil’s left, and started filming.

“Hello, YouTube! This is JaniceTheFirst, and, as you can see, I have a very special guest with me here today. Many of you may know him from his previous appearances on this channel, as well as, you know, being the President of the United States. My uncle: Cecil Palmer!”

Based on what he knew about Janice’s editing style, she would probably insert a stock sound of applause after her statement.

“Hello. It’s good to be here,” he replied.

“Well, let’s skip the introductions and get right into the meat of this, shall we? As all of you who aren’t living under a rock know, Mr. Palmer here made a rather big announcement a couple of days ago. Could you reiterate it, for those viewers at home who don’t know yet?”

She nodded at Cecil, and he leaned into the microphone and said, “I’m gay.”

“And the first United States president to be so openly, I might add. Now, the internet has a lot of questions for you, Mr. Palmer. I have taken it upon myself to sort through these questions and decide which ones would be the best to ask you. Fear not, dear viewers, your questions are soon to be answered. Are you ready, Cecil?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

“Well, with a ringing endorsement like that, we should jump right in. The first question, which has been asked by many people across many platforms: How/when did you know you were gay?” she asked.

“Hmm… that’s a difficult one to put a definite time or cause to. It’s just kind of a slow process. I always felt really weird and confused when boys in my elementary school were talking about the girls that they thought were pretty because I just never could understand what they were talking about. People always told me that I would understand it more when I got older, but I never did. Meanwhile, I was totally fawning over various boys in my classes, but neither they nor I ever noticed. Other than that, I guess that around middle school or high school was when I started trying to figure out what I liked and put a label to my feelings. At that time, I also was able to find other people that were like me, and that made those times a lot better.”

“Here’s a question that a lot of people asked about. Well, it’s more like a topic at this point: Tell us about Carlos!”

“Where do I start? Well, he’s a scientist, which means he’s really smart, like, much smarter than I am. He’s always coming up with new ideas; solutions to problems. He always remembers the little things. He sometimes texts me these little cliché romantic metaphors randomly throughout the day, complete with little heart emojis. When he’s really concentrating on something, he sticks his tongue out slightly and makes these little ‘hmm’ sounds. It’s absolutely adorable.”

“Sounds like you really care about him,” Janice commented.

“Well, he’s my partner. Of course I do.”

She continued asking him questions, some serious, some more light-hearted. Cecil answered all of them. He hoped that his answers were usable.

After a while, Janice looked at the viewscreen on her camera, and her eyes widened.

“Well, that’s all for this video. Thanks for being here, Cecil, and thank you all for watching. All likes and comments are appreciated, and be sure to subscribe for more videos like this. I can’t promise that Cecil will be in all of them, but this certainly won’t be his last appearance on my channel. Bye!”

She leaned forward and turned off the camera. She then turned toward her uncle.

“Well, how did you feel about that?” she asked.

“It’s certainly interesting to be talking about all of this openly. I wonder what Carlos will think of it,” he replied.

“People will probably want him to appear in a video as soon as possible. Well, more than they already do.”

“Have you gotten any hate comments because of me?”

“Oh, lots. It’s nothing I can’t handle, though.”

It was silent for a moment.

“Cecil, can I ask you a question?” she asked.

“Certainly, Janice. What is it?”

“Well… I’m assuming that you and Carlos are going to get married sometime soon, and the role of the First Lady is usually played by the President’s spouse. After you get married, will Carlos become the ‘First Gentleman’?”

Cecil paused. “Honestly, that’s more of a question for Carlos than for me. In an ideal world, it would be his decision. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case. There’ll probably be a lot of pressure from both the press and other politicians to have Carlos take up the role of the First Gentleman. It would probably help them see the relationship as ‘more legitimate’.”

The two of them considered this. There was a knock at the door.

“Come in!” Janice yelled.

Maureen opened the door. Cecil got up out of his chair and walked over to where she was.

“Mr. Palmer, there are some senators that wish to see you right now.” she said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back from my writing class and suffice to say it was (probably) the best three weeks of my life. Hopefully, now that I'm back, I'll be writing more and what I do write will be even better. Thank you for reading! I don't want to give anything away, but shit's gonna start going down in the next chapters.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Political bullshit. Also, Cecil devises a plan.

Cecil’s first impulse was to tell Maureen that he was busy and that the senators would have to wait, but he knew that he was likely on shaky terms with the politicians that wished to see him, and such behavior would cause them to have an even worse opinion of him.

He sighed. “Where are they?” he asked.

“Waiting outside the Oval Office. I’ll take you there.” Maureen replied.

Cecil quickly waved goodbye to Janice and followed his assistant down the hall.

“What did you tell them I was doing?” he asked.

“ ‘Consulting with the First Lady’.” she replied.

“Well, at least you didn’t have to lie.” _We already have to do that enough._

“I love how you haven’t asked what they want you for,” Maureen said.

“Is there anything else that they’d want to ask me about?”

“Well, given that the last time that you’ve had a meeting with any of them was a solid 3 months ago, probably not.”

They arrived at the Oval Office. As Maureen had said, there were four impatient-looking senators outside. When one of them saw Cecil arrive, he said something to the others, and they all turned around to face him. Maureen and Cecil exchanged a look. She mouthed “ _good luck_ ” as she walked away.

“Well, Mr. President, we have a lot to talk about.” one of them— Cecil was fairly sure it was Senator Miles Carson— said.

“Of course we do,” Cecil replied. He opened the door to the Oval Office. “Please, come in. Take a seat.”

Cecil sat down behind his desk. The four senators all pulled up chairs.

“Mr. President, ever since your recent announcement, there has been some… tension within Congress.” Carson began.

“So I’ve heard,” Cecil replied. _Just get to the point._

“Many members of both the House and the Senate have openly considered putting out statements denouncing you and your values to their constituents.” he continued.

“And what would these statements say?”

The senator furthest to Cecil’s left— Cecil had heard him called Sampson earlier— pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket. “I have one right here, sir. Would you like to read it?”

Cecil put out his hand for the senator to give it to him.

The statement read, “ _As a representative of the good people of Mississippi, I cannot, in good conscience, condone the behaviors and lifestyle of President Palmer. Not only is he immoral, but he does not even consider the consequences of his behavior. One cannot be both a homosexual and a true American. They are at their heart contradictory. Citizens of America, I cannot sit back and let the country I love be corrupted by this man’s immoral influence. I will stand against him, not for me, but for the people of America. Thank you, and may God bless this country._ ”

Cecil handed the statement back to the senator before he crushed it in his hand.

“How many others are preparing statements like this?” he asked, gritting his teeth.

“As far as we know, about half a dozen.” Senator Sampson replied.

“Also, the timing of your announcement has upset many senators as well,” Carson said.

_Of all the things to be upset about, the timing?_ “Please elaborate.”

“On Election Night, many conservative lawmakers were unwilling to work with you. In the months between then and Inauguration Day, you were able to turn many of them to your side. This announcement has alienated them, and many feel betrayed.”

“Betrayed by _what,_ exactly?” Cecil asked.

“Well…” he began.

“I don’t entirely understand how my identity can be considered a betrayal, Carson.”

“They would have preferred if you had disclosed that information earlier,” Sampson explained. “It is expected for a politician’s spouse to be in the public eye as well.”

Cecil took a deep breath. “When I was running, neither Carlos nor I was comfortable with that.”

“If that was the case, then—”

“Then what? Then he shouldn’t have dated me? Then I shouldn’t have run for president?”

“According to many, yes.”

There was a long pause.

Cecil stood up from his chair. The four senators stood up with him.

“Thank you all for bringing this to my attention. This meeting is adjourned.”

Cecil shook the senators’ hands, and the four of them left the Oval Office.

Cecil sat back down at his desk. He picked up the phone and dialed the secretary’s desk.

“White House, this is Secretary Nguyen speaking.”

“Do you know where Josie Ortiz is?” Cecil asked.

“She’s in her office.”

“Can you tell her, Maureen, and Carlos to meet me in the Oval Office at 6:00?”

“Ok, whatever.”

“Thanks, Michelle.”

* * *

 

Maureen, Josie, and Carlos were all sitting in chairs in the Oval Office. Cecil paced back and forth in front of them.

“Thank you all for being here on such short notice,” Cecil said. “I know how busy all of you are.”

“As all of you probably guessed by now, I didn’t just call you guys here for chit-chat and catching up. There is something that needs to get done, and I’m going to need all of you to help me do it. I need to acquire engagement rings for me and Carlos”

Carlos looked at Cecil, eyes wide. “Wait, what?”

Cecil mentally kicked himself. He forgot to let Carlos know about his intentions.

“Surprise?” he said.

Maureen rolled her eyes.

“Anyway, all of you have a job to do. Maureen, I need you to cover for me while I’m gone. Make excuses for why I’m not there. Lie, if you have to. The only person that can know where I really am, besides the three of you, is Dana. Let her know as soon as possible after I leave. Josie, I’m gonna need your help getting in and out of the jewelry store quickly and discreetly. I’m gonna need your best agents on the job. This won’t be easy. Carlos, just keep being perfect. Make sure I don’t buy anything that I’ll regret. Do you all understand your jobs?”

The three of them nodded.

“Great. We leave at 8:00 sharp.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's three weeks until school starts up again, so don't be surprised if in September I slow down to updating this every other week or something like that. I just gotta make sure that I stay on top of the work I'm actually supposed to be doing. However, if I end up getting less homework than I'm expecting, I may not need to change my schedule at all.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil and Carlos purchase wedding rings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: The Erikas all have "last names", which consists of random nouns, to tell them apart for job purposes. They are still the same angels that we all know and love.

The average American’s idea of the life of their leader was most likely one of a life filled with luxury and having every need catered to. If an average American imagined what their leader was doing at that very moment, they probably wouldn’t think that he was uncomfortably sandwiched between his boyfriend and a Secret Service agent in the back seats of a black sedan. And yet, that was exactly what was happening to him. 

The most discreet vehicle that was equipped with all the safety equipment that was required to be in a presidential car was a sedan with a fifth seat that could barely qualify as somewhere to sit. While Carlos had offered to sit in the middle, Cecil insisted that he took the center seat. Besides, it wasn’t like he minded it that much. At least Erika didn’t have bad breath.

“Cecil, I can’t see out the window,” Carlos said once the car had started moving.

“That’s because the windows are so tinted that they’re practically opaque. It’s for security reasons.” Cecil explained.

Carlos frowned. Cecil could tell that he was disappointed.

“You know what, next free evening that I have, we’ll go on an actual date in the city,” Cecil said.

“That’d be neat,” Carlos replied. 

He took Cecil’s hands into his own and softly smiled. Carlos leaned his head on his boyfriend’s shoulder, and Cecil started running his hands through Carlos’s hair. It was an action that was calming for both of them. Despite the fact that he knew that the store wasn’t far, Cecil closed his eyes and let himself relax in the most comfortable place in the least comfortable vehicle.

* * *

 

Erika Apple, who was driving the car, was an excellent driver, and they arrived at the jewelry store sooner than Cecil expected. As the car came to a stop, Erika Suede tapped his shoulder to indicate that they had arrived, and Cecil sat up in his seat and unbuckled his seatbelt. Carlos, who had apparently fallen asleep during the drive, was roughly jolted awake, as Cecil’s movement caused his head to fall off the shoulder that he was using as a pillow.

“Are we here?” Carlos asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

Cecil nodded. Carlos reached over to open the car door, but before he could, Erika Apple did it for them. Cecil thanked them and motioned for Carlos to get out of the car so he could follow. As Cecil got out of the car, he saw that he and Carlos were at the back entrance to the jewelry store, presumably so the two of them wouldn’t be noticed by anyone. Erika Suede walked over to open the door, and the four of them walked inside.

Someone must have called ahead because the jeweler was waiting for them at the door. Her name tag read “Edith Johnson”.

“How may I help you today, Mr. President?” she asked.

“My boyfriend and I are looking to purchase engagement rings,” Cecil said.

Edith nodded. “Would you like to see our selection of rings?” She motioned for them to follow her.

“Yes, please,” Carlos said.

She leads them over to a glass case filled with various rings with various levels of ornateness. “If you two aren’t satisfied with the selection that we have here, there’s more in the back. If those still aren’t right, something can always be custom-made.”

“Thank you. I’m sure we’ll find something.” Carlos said.

Carlos took his boyfriend by the hand and pulled him over to one of the cases that held the rings. Cecil was overwhelmed by the selection. Steve wasn’t exaggerating when he said that they did high-quality work. However, none of them seemed to catch his eye, except for one. Its rather plain design and location in the corner of the case made it difficult to spot, but Cecil knew it was right. It was bronze, with a texture gridded squares covering its surface. Cecil didn’t know why it appealed to him, but when he looked back at his boyfriend, he realized why. The ring was the color of Carlos’s eyes.

Cecil tapped Carlos’s shoulder. “I think I found one,” he said.

“I’ve got one, too,” Carlos replied. “That one, right there. Second row, center.”

The ring in question had a band of pewter, with a rectangle of bismuth set in it.

“It’s beautiful, Carlos. The one I found is a little less fancy. It’s the one in the upper left corner.” Cecil said.

“Ceec, I love it,” Carlos replied. He smiled and squeezed Cecil’s hand. “I think we’ve made our decision.”

* * *

 

Cecil and Carlos were back in the sedan. The rings needed to be resized to fit their fingers, and so they wouldn’t be ready for another week. That was fine. They needed the time to figure out how to announce an engagement.

“You ready for this, Ceec?” Carlos asked.

“As your boyfriend or as the President?” Cecil replied.

“Either, I suppose.”

“As the President, I have no idea. There’ll probably be some sort of conservative backlash. I have no idea how to plan a presidential wedding, I know nothing about how to become a married man.”

“Okay, well, what about as my boyfriend?”

“It feels like I’ve been ready forever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this was just some tooth-rotting fluff before things get painful.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being the president and being autistic are often at odds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: this chapter does contain description of self-injurious behavior as something that happens in a meltdown.

Cecil didn’t know what the cabinet meeting was about, though not for lack of trying. He knew that his people were working hard on something, but that something he simply could not latch onto. He didn’t feel connected to the room. He didn’t really talk, except for the occasional sound of acknowledgment. The meeting, thankfully, was able to function without his full involvement.

Vice President Cardinal had to clear her throat to get Cecil’s attention so he could adjourn the meeting. He followed everyone else out of the room. He vaguely remembered himself asking Maureen to clear his schedule before he ascended the stairs to his bedroom.

He closed the door behind him. He tried to lock the door, but he couldn’t remember how. He sat on the floor of the bedroom. He looked at his hands. They felt detached. He walked into his bathroom. He turned on the faucet and put his hands under the stream of lukewarm water that came out. He could barely feel it against his hands. He turned up the temperature. He still couldn’t feel anything. He made it hotter and hotter, so hot that it almost felt cold. He still barely felt it. He turned off the water. He reentered the bedroom.

He sat on the floor again. He forgot to roll up his sleeves when he put his hands in the water, so the sleeves of his shirt and his coat were soaking wet. He couldn’t stand them. He took off his coat, his tie, his button-up shirt. He threw them in the general direction of the closet. His pants felt wrong, too. He took them off and threw them as well. He looked at his hands. He still couldn’t feel them. He bit his left index finger. He felt the low resistance of skin and muscle, the immovability of the bone. He bit it again. He could feel that sensation. There was at least something that he could still feel. 

He continued to bite, moving onto his other fingers. It hurt, of course, but the pain was reassurance. He was still there. He was still  _ there _ . He wanted to close his eyes, the lights were too bright, but at the same time, if he closed his eyes, he would be lost again. He couldn’t focus on any one thing, everything was too bright. His eyes flitted about the room, the wall, the floor, the door to the bathroom, still slightly ajar, the pile of clothes by the closet door. He rocked back and forth as he bit. He could almost feel his hands.

A sound that indicated someone opening the door. That was bad. He knew that he had to stop biting, stop rocking. He couldn’t stop biting, stop rocking. He heard footsteps as if through water. Something was placed in his hand. He looked at it. A purple jellyfish made of rubber. Something to chew on. He put it in his mouth and started chewing on it instead of his hand. He still rocked, but more slowly, less desperately. 

“Can I rub your back?”

Cecil nodded. He felt a familiar hand running up and down the length of his back, moving with him as he did. He could feel the hand against his back. He could feel the resistance of the rubber against his teeth. He could feel points of contact, keeping him connected to the world.

“Do you want to sit on the bed instead of on the floor?”

Cecil nodded. Strong arms lifted him onto his feet and guided him to his bed,  _ their _ bed. Cecil curled into a ball on top of the bed. Carlos laid down across from him. Carlos softly hummed as he rubbed Cecil’s back, and Cecil moved in closer so he could rest his head on Carlos’s chest. The sound of Carlos’s voice rumbling in his chest was soothing. More points of connection were made.

“Four score and seven years ago…” Carlos said.

“Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this. But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate— we can not consecrate— we can not hallow— this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us— that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion— that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain— that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom— and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.”

Cecil knew the entire Gettysburg address by heart and had known it for most of his life. It was a comfort, of sorts: words other than his own that he could use when he had none left.

“Government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.” he repeated.

“Are you okay, Ceec?” Carlos asked.

“Better,” Cecil replied.

“I’m sorry that I didn’t get here sooner.”

“Not your fault.”

“I’m here now.”

“Is everything okay downstairs?”

“Maureen and Dana were able to take care of everything. You don’t have to worry about any of that right now.”

“No more work.”

“You’ve been working very hard for the past week. You’re allowed to take a break. Now, I came up here to ask you if you wanted to watch a movie. Are you up for it?”

Cecil nodded. He shifted into a sitting position.

“It’s my turn to pick, by the way. I’m thinking  _ The Martian _ .” Carlos said, walking over to grab some clothes for Cecil.

“For the seventh time?” Cecil replied. 

Carlos tossed a pair of flannel pants and a campaign t-shirt from Cecil’s first bid for U.S. Senator. Cecil put them on and walked over to the door.

“It’s a good movie! Also, it’s only the sixth time that I’ve seen it.”

“You’ve only seen it that many times because you have a crush on Mark Watney.”

“Do not!” Cecil gave his boyfriend a pointed look. “Okay, maybe a little. Just a teeny,  _ tiny _ bit. And, besides, I can’t help it. He’s a smart, attractive man. I like smart, attractive men.”

Cecil rolled his eyes and exaggeratedly sighed.

“However, there’s one  _ very _ smart,  _ very _ attractive man by the name of Cecil Gershwin Palmer that I like more than any fictional man.” Carlos continued.

Cecil grabbed the front of Carlos’s shirt and pulled him in so their lips were mere inches apart.

“God, you flatter me,” Cecil murmured before the two of them completed the kiss. The two of them pulled apart. “I don’t know about you, but I haven’t eaten dinner yet. I’ll find something in the fridge if you can go get the movie set up,” he said.

“Deal,” Carlos replied.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil has to work late, and Carlos is stressed.

Cecil always had work to do. Some of his work was more enjoyable than others, but he  _ liked _ his job. Well, except for budget negotiations.  _ Fuck _ budget negotiations.

It was 8 pm, and instead of having an after-work date with his boyfriend like he usually would at that hour, Cecil was having to listen to the chair of the Senate's budget committee tell him everything that was wrong with his proposed budget, and exactly why it was wrong, without giving even the smallest solution. 

It had only been ten minutes, but thanks to his annoyance at the proposed changes and the other stresses of the day, he was already on edge. Thankfully, since the meeting was over the phone, Cecil was able to flap with his free hand in an attempt to keep himself regulated. It wasn’t exactly an ideal set-up, but it was better than nothing.

“Ma’am, is it correct that you believe that the budget draft that I have sent you gives too much money to the Department of Education?” Cecil asked. As he said this, he pulled a tangle out of his desk drawer and started using it instead of flapping.

“Yes, that is correct.” she replied.

Cecil took a deep breath, which he hoped that she wasn’t able to hear over the phone. “Madam Chair, are you aware that a majority of the public school districts in our largest cities are in massive amounts of debt? Without more funding, they will be forced to close schools, which will lead to overcrowding and even more problems. Do you have a solution to this, ma’am?”

“Mr. President, there are other areas that need funding much more urgently—”

“Which is a stance that you have made very that you support. As a member of the Senate, you, of course, have the final say in how this budget will turn out, but I hope that you will, if not agree with me, at least understand why I believe that funding for our public schools is so important.”

“Well, sir, this may need to be one of many, many places where we must agree to disagree. Unfortunately, it’s getting late, and I need to get home soon. To be completely honest, I haven’t even eaten dinner yet.”

“Your health is a priority, Madam Chair. We can certainly continue this discussion tomorrow.”

The two of them said their goodbyes, and Cecil hung up. He let out a deep sigh. He stood up out of his chair and stretched for several seconds. He put his tangle back in his drawer, as he knew that if he took it out of the room, he would forget to ever return it. He left the Oval Office and began his walk to the main kitchen, where he knew that Laura would be finishing up her shift.

Laura, the Executive Chef of the White House, was considered by Cecil to be the best chef in the country. Some people were put off by the tree branches growing out of her chest, arms, and neck, but as long as she covered them up with hair nets, and none of the leaves or fruit got into the food, there was no reason not to let her cook because of them. She was a quick learner and had learned how cook most of the things that Cecil would ask for on a regular basis within the first couple of weeks that he had moved in.

“What would you like today, sir?” she asked when he arrived.

“I have no idea, Laura.” he replied.

“Well, last time you had dinner this late, you asked for falafel. Would you like that again, sir?”

“Sure, whatever.”

She returned to the kitchen to prepare his food.

It wasn’t even very late, but Cecil was mentally exhausted. He leaned against the wall as he waited for Laura to prepare his food. He silently bemoaned the fact that he had forgotten to grab his chew that morning. He often wore it under his shirt; out of sight, but still there if he needed it.

“Here’s your food, sir. Have a nice night!”

Cecil nodded and mumbled “thank you,” and began to make his way up to his bedroom.

* * *

 

Understandably, Carlos was already there. Unlike Cecil, he rarely had to work unusual hours. Cecil set down his food and walked over to where Carlos was sitting on their bed.

“Hey, pooh.” He stood up and pulled Cecil into a soft kiss. “Long day?”

Cecil let out a mirthless chuckle. “Certainly,” he replied. “I haven’t even eaten dinner yet.”

“Well, you can certainly get to that, but first let’s get you out of that stuffy suit,” Carlos said, already beginning to loosen Cecil’s tie.

Cecil caught his boyfriend’s lips in a kiss. “I appreciate the sentiment, dear, but I’m afraid that if you do remove my suit, eating dinner won’t exactly be my top priority anymore.”

“Well, I suppose that you make a compelling argument,” Carlos said. “What did you get?”

“I couldn’t think of anything, so Laura just made falafel. Do you want some?”

“Any other time, I’d gladly accept, but I just stress ate an unhealthy amount of tortilla chips, so I’m good.”

“The conference?” Cecil asked.

Carlos sighed. “Yes.”

Cecil put his hand on his boyfriend’s back. “Carlos, I’ve seen how much you’ve been preparing for this. You’ll be wonderful.”

“Ceec, I  _ wish _ this was just simple nerves, but it’s not. This is the first time that I’ve been in the public eye since we came out. I have no idea how people will react.”

“Carlos, there will be so many brilliant minds at this conference. Brilliant, open-minded people.” Cecil replied.

“But what if—”

“And if they don’t respect you, if they don’t see you as their equal, well, why would you want to be working with them anyway?”

“I suppose that’s true. Thanks, honey.”

“You’re welcome. Now, I must get to eating.”

* * *

 

The two of them sat together on their bed, Cecil laughing at Carlos’s impression of the rather nasal-voiced Senate Budget Committee Chair.

“No money for education, they can buy textbooks with their own blood!” Carlos quizzaciously said.

“But, wait, isn’t that what already happens?” Cecil asked.

They both burst into laughter.

“Enough talk about work,” Cecil said after they had stopped laughing. “I think it’s about time I got the rest of this itchy thing off.” 

He finished untying his tie and slid it out of the collar of his shirt. Carlos, catching onto what his boyfriend was implying, started to unbutton Cecil’s shirt. Their lips met in an intense kiss. Carlos slid Cecil’s suit jacket and dress shirt off his shoulders and tossed them aside. He pushed Cecil back onto the bed. He roughly kissed Cecil’s neck, just below his ear, and Cecil knew that it would leave a mark. Cecil slid his hands underneath Carlos’s shirt and started sliding his hands up Carlos’s torso, lifting the shirt up with them. Carlos kissed Cecil where his neck met his collarbone, and Cecil softly moaned in response. Carlos continued kissing down Cecil’s torso, and Cecil relaxed into something that had been done dozens of times before, but still felt new every time.

* * *

 

Cecil faintly heard knocking on the door. He groaned at the sound and rolled over onto his stomach in an attempt to get away from it, pulling Carlos’s arm (which had been slung over his shoulder) with him. This action caused Carlos to wake up as well.

“Ceec, go answer the door,” Carlos mumbled into Cecil’s neck.

“As the president, I order you to answer the door,” Cecil replied.

In response to this, Carlos shoved Cecil out of the bed. Both falling out from underneath the warm covers and landing on the floor caused Cecil to wake up more fully. Since he couldn’t answer the door naked, he went over to put on a bathrobe, so he would at least look somewhat professional. As he put on the robe, he realized that anyone who looked at him would be able to tell what he had been doing the previous night. His hair was a complete mess, far messier than simple bedhead could account for, and there were several tell-tale marks on his neck. He attempted to use his fingers to comb his hair into some semblance of order and took a deep breath. He walked over to the door and opened it.

“Finally,” Maureen said. “If you had taken any longer to answer, I would have kicked down the door myself.”

“Please, don’t do that,” Cecil replied. “What’s going on?”

“You have a conference call with a number of world leaders in fifteen minutes,” she paused to look Cecil up and down. “And, by the looks of you right now, you’re gonna need to devote most of that time to getting ready. Good luck, sir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my last chapter of the summer since I'm going back to school on Tuesday. So far, I'm not sure if I'll change my update schedule, but I'll let you guys know in the end notes of the next chapter.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil has a call with some of his international allies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To avoid confusion, here is each world leader and the country that they are in charge of.
> 
> Prime Minister Elinor Mathias- United Kingdom  
> Chancellor Nils Wechsler- Germany  
> President Tristan Monteil- France  
> President Si Yeong-Hee- South Korea  
> President Catarina Pereira- Brazil
> 
> Also, all of the subjects that I chose for their conference speeches are relevant topics in their respective countries. If you have any questions about them, feel free to leave them in comments.

This was one of the many times that Cecil wished that he could control his shapeshifting. If he was able to do so, he could cause his hickeys to disappear, or at least move to a less conspicuous place on his body, and force his hair into some semblance of order.

Unfortunately, this ability was beyond him, and so he had to cover things up with concealer and spend quite a bit of time— more time than he felt comfortable admitting— attacking his hair with a wet comb. He silently bemoaned the fact that he couldn’t cover his hair with a hat, as that would make things significantly easier for him. He pulled on a shirt and pants, hurriedly buttoned up his shirt and tied on a tie, put on a suit jacket, and slipped on a pair of shoes. He quickly kissed Carlos’s forehead and left the bedroom.

Maureen was waiting outside for him.

“How do I look?” Cecil asked as they made the journey to the Oval Office.

“With all due respect, sir, you look half-asleep.” she replied.

“Well, this is what happens when half a dozen world leaders from across the world have to compromise on a time for a conference call. Damn time zones.”

“Aren’t you just the picture of positivity?” Maureen deadpanned.

Cecil walked into the Oval Office and sat down in his chair. As he did, he let out a deep sigh. “Maureen, can you make yourself useful and get me some coffee?”

She rolled her eyes and left the room.

Cecil picked up the phone and dialed the IT person who was in charge of setting up the conference call for him. For various, amorphous reasons that eventually boiled down to overly-paranoid security measures, Cecil wasn’t allowed to do it himself. After about thirty seconds of waiting, the IT person had set up the call. Cecil tapped the fingers of his free hand against the arm of his chair as he waited for everyone to pick up the phone.

Cecil couldn’t believe that he had forgotten about the call, considering he was the one who was responsible for setting it up. It had taken a good week to coordinate a time that would work for all of them. This, unfortunately, meant that President Si Yeong-Hee had to call at 10:00 at night, which was inconvenient, to say the least.

“Hello,” Chancellor Nils Wechsler said. “I am glad that our plans have finally worked out.”

“Certainly, Chancellor.” President Tristan Monteil replied.

“Let’s get this call done quickly, shall we? I would like to be able to get to sleep before midnight.” President Si added.

“Of course, Madam President,” President Catarina Pereira said. “Well, Palmer, since you’re the one who set up this call, what’s the plan?”

“I’m honestly not quite sure. I was hoping that you all might have some ideas.” Cecil said.

Mathias loudly sighed.

“Fine, fine, you don’t have to be like that, Mathias. I suppose I have a _few_ things we could discuss,” He leaned back in his chair. “As you all know, there is approximately a month and a half until the G20 conference here in DC. Each of you is holding a speech on a relevant issue that will be decided on by the people of your country.”

“Which was an awful idea, by the way.” President Si interrupted.

“But a great way to _connect_ with the people that we each represent,” President Pereira replied. “Please, continue.”

“The topic for each speech has been chosen, and I hold the results right here. You all have received them as well, but I thought that might be nice to hear about them all together.

“Wechsler, your topic is sustainable energy. Monteil, yours is religion and government. Si, suicide. Pereira, government corruption. Mathias, immigration. And my topic is LGBT rights.”

“I feel like ‘controversial’ might be a better choice of words there, Palmer,” Monteil replied.

“No kidding,” Wechsler added.

“I understand that it might be difficult to give a speech on this topic, but this is what the people want to hear about,” Cecil said.

There was a brief moment of silence.

“This isn’t the only thing that you’re calling about, Palmer,” Pereira commented.

“Right as always, Madam President,” Cecil replied.

“So, what is it?” Si said.

Cecil took a deep breath. “I’m worried about how some of the other leaders at the conference will act toward me in light of… recent revelations.”

“I’m sure that they’ll be able to be… civil.” Monteil replied.

“Are you sure about that?” Mathias asked. “Many G20 countries don’t exactly have the best track record in these areas.”

“Which is something that I am well aware of,” Cecil explained. “I’m probably not going to change the minds of those people.”

“If you’re not going to change their minds, then why are you worried?” Pereira asked.

Cecil paused. “Because Carlos and I are getting married.”

There was a stunned silence.

“This is private information at the moment. We aren’t even officially engaged yet,” Cecil continued. “I realize that there are many political repercussions to this, but I can’t wait any longer. I just wanted to let you all know.”

“Well, this news will certainly overshadow anything that happens at the conference,” Wechsler commented.

“You have my blessing, Palmer,” Pereira said. “I know that I speak for all of us here when I say that we support you in this.”

“Thank you, Pereira.”

* * *

 

“Cecil, look what arrived today!” Carlos exclaimed as Cecil reentered the bedroom after his call. He held up a small cardboard box.

“And what is that?” Cecil asked.

Carlos opened the flaps of the box and pulled out two smaller boxes covered in black velvet. He handed one of them to Cecil.

Cecil opened it, and inside, a bronze ring softly shone.

The two of them looked up at each other, and Carlos smiled.

“Carlos,” Cecil got down on one knee. “Will you—”

“Yes!” Carlos interrupted.

Cecil chuckled. “I’m not even finished yet, bunny,” He cleared his throat. “Will you, Carlos, make me the happiest man on Earth and marry me?” He opened the box.

Carlos covered his mouth. Cecil could tell that he was beginning to cry.

“Yes!” Carlos exclaimed. He opened his box. “Will you marry me?”

The two of them laughed.

“Of course,” Cecil replied. He stood up from kneeling and embraced his fiancé.

He removed the ring from the box and slid it onto Carlos’s finger. Carlos did the same with his. They kissed. The tears that ran down their cheeks mingled with each other.

When the two of them broke apart, Carlos took Cecil’s hands into his own and faced him.

“Are you ready to tell the world?” Carlos asked.

“If I had my way, not a soul on Earth would be unaware of my love for you,” Cecil replied.

Carlos nodded. He released Cecil’s hands from his grasp and gestured toward the phone on Cecil’s desk.

Cecil walked over to it and picked it up. He dialed Pamela Winchell’s office.

“Pamela, I need you to schedule a special press conference tonight. There’s something that the world needs to know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you all can tell, I have decided to shift to an every other Sunday upload schedule until further notice. This is to ensure that I put enough effort into both this fic and my actual school work. In the immortal words of Ron Swanson, "Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing."


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One cannot be both a homosexual and a true American.

Yet again, Cecil stood behind the curtains of the White House press room. He nervously twisted the ring on his finger around and around and attempted to calm his breathing. He wanted to contact Pamela and tell her to call off the whole thing, but he needed to break the news right then and there. Waiting would do nothing. He heard the sound of heels clicking against the podium and the sound of Pamela clearing her throat. He wished that Carlos was there.

“Ladies and gentlemen of the press, your President, Cecil Palmer.”

Cecil walked through the curtain. He could almost feel the bright flashes of the cameras hot against his skin. He suppressed a wince at the dazzling display.

He took one more deep breath before he stepped up to the microphone.

“Good evening. I have called this press conference to break some important news. Carlos and I are engaged.”

Those five words set off a commotion among the assembled reporters. Many of them stood up to ask questions.

“Before any of you ask questions. I will attempt to answer some of them before they are asked. This is a recent development, so no, we have not been keeping this news secret. We do not know when we are going to be getting married, nor if it will be before or after the G20 event. We will be doing our best to take this at our own pace. The reason why Carlos is not with me to make this announcement is because he is speaking at a scientific conference next week, and he is working on what he will be saying. If there are any additional questions, Ms. Winchell will do her best to answer them. Thank you for your time.”

Cecil stepped away from the podium and walked through the curtain.

* * *

Cecil was sitting behind his Oval Office desk, absent-mindedly flipping through the pages of his planner (a purchase that had not been his idea, but one he was grateful for, nonetheless). Several hours had passed since his big announcement, and Cecil was feeling fairly confident about what had gone down. He couldn’t help but smile. He and Carlos would get married, and after the initial fuss over the nuptials, things would finally return to normal.

Unfortunately, Cecil’s quiet moment was interrupted by a frantic knocking at the door.

“Come in.” he said.

Pamela Winchell entered the room.

Cecil smiled slightly. “So, did I do a good job on that announcement or what?” he asked.

“Congratulations on becoming the talk of the tabloids, yet again.” she replied.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Your ‘answers’ clarified  _ nothing _ . All they did was confuse everyone, and left a bigger mess for me to clean up, I might add.”

“Well…” Cecil trailed off. “At least it wasn’t a  _ complete _ disaster.”

“Before you say that, I suggest that you turn on the TV.”

Cecil searched through his drawers until he found the remote, and turned on the television.  It was already turned to a news channel.

A female reporter was standing in front of a group of protesters holding signs and chanting. Cecil couldn’t read the signs, nor did he know where they were, but the reporter answered the latter question before he could ask.

“I am here in Jackson, Mississippi reporting on a protest of sorts that has sprung up in the wake of President Palmer’s announcement. Of those that we have spoken to, many of them say that they have been inspired to protest by Senator Charles Whitney’s speech last Tuesday, which openly condemned the President’s sexuality. It appears that an action of this sort has been in the works for quite a while, but today’s events have given the discontented a reason to rally. The phrase ‘one cannot be both a homosexual and a true American’ has been picked up as a sort of battle cry by the self-proclaimed ‘moral opposition’. These people, many of them from small towns, argue that the President must uphold traditional American values and that a gay president simply cannot do this. It is not clear what the goals of the moral opposition are, but it is clear that they will not step down quietly.”

Cecil turned off the television. He put his head in his hands.

“What the hell am I supposed to do?”

“Frankly, sir, I have no idea. You’re the first president to ever be in this situation. My best suggestion would be to call a meeting of advisors, but other than that, sometimes you just gotta turn the other cheek.” Winchell replied.

Cecil was silent for a moment.

“Why do I even bother?” His voice was more thought than word. “I just want to love him without it getting political.”

“Sir, you are the President of the United States. Your entire life is political.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for giving this chapter such a downer ending, but since I have chosen to go with world almost identical to our own for this AU, I have to write these kinds of scenes in, because if the United States had a gay president at this point in time, this is what would happen to him. As much as I wish that it could be all laughs and fluff, it simply isn't realistic.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He wanted to show them that he wasn't going to back down.

Cecil had been sitting on the end of the bed for a good ten minutes. He felt angry, of course, but mostly he just felt numb. His legs bounced up and down in unison, counting out the tempo for a silent song. His gaze wandered to the phone next to him, just barely touching his right hand. He moved to pick it up, but his hand stopped just before he did. It stayed just above, slightly shaking. He put his hand back down.

More than anything, he wanted to talk to Carlos. But Carlos was at work, and Cecil didn’t want to interrupt him. He knew how easy it was to break Carlos’s concentration, and if he even told Carlos half of what had happened in the wake of Cecil’s announcement, he wouldn’t be able to go back to work.

He moved to pick it up again.  _ Surely a simple text won’t hurt. _

“Hey honey—” he began to type, but then stopped. What did he want to say?  _ Hey honey, sorry to bother you at work, but a bunch of people who hate us because of who we are have started protesting across the country. Love you! _

That’s not what he wanted to say. So, what did he want to say? He wanted to tell Carlos about how he was scared and angry and how he wanted to take Marine One down to Jackson to tell them all how wrong they were, but how he couldn’t do anything because the president was supposed to turn the other cheek. He wanted— he wanted to be able to do something. He wanted to show them how he wasn’t going to back down.

“Hey honey, let’s go out for dinner tonight.”

* * *

 

It wasn’t easy to get a reservation at a high-end restaurant only five hours in advance. At least, it would be difficult if it wasn’t for the president.

The restaurant that Cecil and Carlos found themselves at was chosen for them by Maureen and Michelle through unknown methods. It was an Italian place, known for its pasta. The two of them sat at a table on the second floor of the restaurant, next to a window that, if one looked hard enough, the Washington Monument could be seen from. Personally, Cecil would have preferred to pick up food at a fast-casual restaurant and have a picnic at the base of the Monument, but he had been told that such a thing wouldn’t be very “presidential”, which was disappointing. And while the food that they would be having was far nicer, Cecil was disappointed that the occasion wouldn’t be as intimate.

After they had ordered appetizers and a bottle of wine, Carlos took Cecil’s hand into his own.

“Is this okay?” he asked.

Cecil nodded.

Carlos smiled. “This is nice.”

“Yeah, it is,” Cecil replied.

Carlos frowned. “Is everything alright? You sound distracted.”

“Have you seen the news at all today?” Cecil asked.

“No, I’ve been too busy preparing for the conference. Why?” Carlos replied.

Cecil sighed. “A group of people calling themselves the ‘moral opposition’ have been protesting following my announcement this morning.”

“Have they hurt anyone?” Worry was clear in Carlos’s voice.

“No, not yet. They’ve just been holding signs and marching.” Cecil replied.

“What do they want?” Carlos asked.

“Who knows? So far, the only thing that I can think of that would placate them would be if I resigned or suddenly turned straight, both of which aren’t going to happen.”

“What are you going to do?”

“To be perfectly honest, dear, I don’t know. I just know that I can’t back down. I have to show them that I’m not scared; that I’m gonna continue living my life the way  _ I _ want to.”

“That’s the Cecil I know,” Carlos said. He squeezed Cecil’s hand and smiled.

* * *

 

Cecil had not made a bad choice in trusting Michelle and Maureen to pick the restaurant. The pasta was excellent, and Cecil made a mental note to ask Michelle to figure out if the place did catering. Once their entrees arrived, the topic of conversation shifted to much lighter subject matter and subtly flirtatious banter. However, just as Cecil was finishing his carbonara, he figured out what he was going to do.

“Carlos, honey, I figured out what I want to do!” he said.

“That’s great!” Carlos replied.

“There’s an executive order I’d been considering drafting that might be a good choice. It’ll work until actual legislation can be proposed.”

“Well, tell me what it is.”

* * *

 

_ “Breaking news: the President has signed Executive Order 27, which, if put into effect, would require all government-funded buildings to provide at least one accessible gender-neutral bathroom facility. It is not yet clear what buildings are covered by this order, but it is safe to assume that all local, state, and federal government offices will be covered. It is likely that this order will also cover public schools, though there will most likely be tension as schools decide whether or not to comply with this order. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this chapter is kind of short-- sorry about that. School can be a real pain sometimes. However, this upcoming school week is a three-day week, which means that my next update might be longer. Also, if I ever have the time to write it, would any of you all be interested in a little one-shot in this universe from the perspective of Carlos or another character, or from before this fic starts? After the debate season ends and I have more free time, I might write some of those. So, please tell me if those would interest any of you guys, and thanks for reading!


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The President of the United States needs a vacation.

Cecil stood outside the Cabinet meeting room. Everyone was already assembled inside, but he didn’t want to enter just yet. What exactly would they talk about at the meeting? Obviously, the consequences of Executive Order 27 still loomed large, but there wasn’t much they could do until it had been implemented for long enough for the effects to be apparent.

He leaned his head against the door. The faint chatter of employees talking further down the hallway echoed in his ears like the buzzing of cicadas. He wanted to block it out, but he knew that it was frowned upon for the president to wear earplugs everywhere. He started to chuckle at the image in his brain of him wearing earplugs everywhere. That would certainly make headlines. Before long, chuckling had turned into full-blown laughter, and all he could imagine was what would happen if the president started flapping at a press conference. All sorts of interesting language would be thrown around.

He was so focused on his own thoughts that he didn’t notice the other door opening. Someone tapped his shoulder. It was Dana Cardinal.

“Sir, we’ve been waiting for almost ten minutes. Can you come in so we can start this meeting?” she asked.

“Of course,” he said. He followed her inside and took his usual spot at the table.

Sheriff Sam ###, Cecil’s Secretary of Homeland Security, cleared their throat. “Mr. President, before we start, I would like to thank you for passing this act. It— it means a lot to me.”

“You are very welcome, Sam,” Cecil replied. “Now, on that note, have any of you received new information from your departments regarding Executive Order 27?”

“Well, this action has caused quite a bit of fuss in the Department of Education, Mr. President,” Secretary Carlsberg said. “Some people are actually quite upset, sir.” He nervously laughed.

“Many generals are worried about what this means for military facilities.” Secretary McDaniel’s blue head said.

“Same with prison officials,” Secretary Flynn added. “The wording of the action is quite vague, sir.”

“I know that ‘government-funded buildings’ is a broad term, but I wanted the action to cover as many buildings as possible without being unnecessarily long. Besides, this is just to cover the issue until actual legislation can be passed.” Cecil explained.

“Speaking of legislation,” Vice President Cardinal said, “how exactly are we going to pass a bill like this in the current House or Senate? We barely have a majority in either, and I’m not sure what we could do to get conservatives on our side. We’d probably have to concede some other bill, which would end up alienating some of our allies in Congress. We’re in quite the situation, sir.”

Cecil sighed. He could feel his legs starting to bounce underneath the table, but out of sync.

“Set up meetings with the people who can help us get this passed,” he said. “Talk to those who are angry. Do  _ something _ .” 

His hands were shaking on top of the table. He moved his left hand back and forth, and then his right. His legs were still patternless.

“Sir, are you okay?” Sheriff Sam asked.

“I’m fine,” Cecil replied. He saw Dana and Abby exchange a look.

“This meeting is adjourned,” Dana said. 

Cecil stood up to leave. 

“Cecil, you stay here,” Abby said.

He sat back down. It felt like it took forever for the room to clear out.

“Mr. Palmer, Abby has been talking to me,” Dana said. “She says that she’s concerned about your health.” She looked at Abby.

“We’re worried that you’ve been putting too much pressure on yourself.” Abby continued.

“I’m fine,” Cecil replied. His legs began to move around, painting abstract curves.

“Cecil, you are not fine,” Abby said. “You’re kicking in circles. You only do that when you’re nervous. I could tell that you wanted to start rocking during the meeting.”

She put her hand on Cecil’s shoulder. He flinched. She pulled her hand away.

“You can’t keep holding yourself in,” she said.

The words of Cecil’s political mentor, Leonard Burton, came to mind.

_ There’s a fine line between “eccentric” and “weird”, Cecil, and that line is what people can and cannot understand. People don’t elect “weird” politicians because they don’t elect people that they don’t understand. They want to feel like they know you, Cecil. _

Leonard’s words got him into the state Senate, and then the U.S. Senate, and then the Presidency. He was a fun-loving, young politician who knew how the world worked and wanted to make a difference. That’s what he got elected on. Now, what was he? A gay anti-American, of course. A gay anti-American who didn’t do what other people wanted him to do. A gay anti-American who didn’t do what other people wanted him to do whose brain often worked against him. 

A gay anti-American who didn’t do what other people wanted him to do whose brain often worked against him who was spiraling downward inside his own head.

“Cecil? Cecil!”

He looked over at Abby.

“Cecil, you need a vacation,” Dana said.

“I don’t need a vacation,” he replied.

“Like hell you do,” Abby said. “You and Carlos both. You’re both completely focused on work. Name one day in the past month where Carlos wasn’t stressing over his conference.”

There was a pause.

“You can’t,” she continued. “That’s all that’s been on his mind. I’m sure that concerns you. Well, that’s what you’ve been like ever since you came out, Cecil, and how you feel about Carlos being stressed is how the rest of us feel about you. You can’t work like this, and if you keep pushing yourself, one of these days you’re gonna snap, and I’m sure that you don’t want people writing about the president’s mental breakdown.”

“Fine. I suppose I should take a vacation.”

* * *

 

“A vacation? But I just got back from the conference! I have so much work that I need to catch up on!” Carlos exclaimed.

“That’s exactly why we both need to get away for a while, bunny,” Cecil replied.

“I’m fine, Cecil. Look at me. I’m completely in control.”

“Carlos, you’ve been having a meltdown almost every other night for the past two weeks. You’re not okay. Even that would be enough, but you’ve also not been sleeping enough and barely eating.”

A brief silence as Carlos took in Cecil’s words.

“Well, where should we go, then?” Carlos asked.

“For starters, we should probably stay in-country. Personally, I was thinking just going to Camp David. People won’t be able to bother us up there.” Cecil replied.

“Is there a science lab there?”

Cecil chuckled. “Honey, the whole point of this is to get away from work.”

“I was joking, Ceec. Camp David sounds like the perfect place.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I read "It Devours!" as soon as I could, and I loved it. Not sure if this counts as spoilers or not, but a lot of the language in the book points to Carlos being autistic. There's a lot of emphasis put on the fact that Carlos doesn't like to and has difficulty verbally expressing his emotions, and that he is really weird about how he likes to be touched. Personally, I'm holding out hope for Joseph or Jeffery to confirm this, because Carlos being canonically autistic would mean the world to me. Us autistic people get little to no representation in fiction, and when we do, it is often stereotypical or just flat out inaccurate, so it would be nice to get a canon autistic character who defies stereotypes and is a well-developed character beyond being autistic. Sorry for the ramble, but this means a lot to me.


End file.
